Yes ladies and gentleman, it’s that time for the last post of my journey. No more tales of private parties or wacky people I’ve met along the way, no more talk of climbing volcanoes or diving in incredible waters. From now on it’s back to reality and a big dose of it it will be.
What have I been up to since the last time we spoke? Well, the girls Jess and Laura and I departed company which brought about some sadness at the thought that we now won’t see each other for 7 months (in Laura’s case) and a year in Jess’s case. But that’s the good thing about the internet and Facebook I guess!
On Saturday I went diving on the North of the island at a place called Tulamben which is where the famous USS Liberty warship wreck is and boy was it worth the money! It was amazing and I actually think I was more interested in the wreck itself than the fish haha. It’s weird but because I dove in Thailand so many times, you see a lot of the same fish and then when I got here I saw so many others…think I’m going to have to buy myself a fish book when I get home just so I can take a nice, slow look at everything I’ve seen…can’t wait! It was also pretty cool to see the black volcanic sand and be able to swim through the wreck itself.
Yesterday I spent the morning down at the beach topping up my tan for the last time before coming back to the hostel and chilling out at the pool with an American girl called Francesa that I’d met the night before. Then, Dutchie (who slept in the bed underneath me) showed up…he and an American guy called Brandon had gone on their scooters with the intention of going to Uluwatu temple but Dutchie lost Brandon pretty quick in the rush-hour traffic. Next thing we know, Brandon comes round the corner and the whole left-side of his body is covered in bruises and cuts….he’d been hit by a car and was bleeding pretty bad. So I went to reception to ask for a first aid kit thinking one of the staff would be trained but no…muggins here got the job. So I sat Brandon down, started cleaning him up etc and he was in so much pain I thought he was either going to cry or pass out which was weird to see as he’s a 6ft muscly, strong-looking Americano. In all honesty, I got a bit emotional seeing him in that much pain knowing there wasn’t much I could do for him. But anyway, I got him patched up and gave him some pain pills to help. A new guy from England had showed up as well and after Brandon had relaxed for a bit we all headed out for dinner together….Dutchie, Brandon, Francesa, me and English Boy and we had fun though Brandon was still suffering and had odds flip-flops on because his other got trashed…we felt so sorry for him. But I had a great cocktail called a Devil’s Shooter which was yummy!
When we got back to the hostel I patched Brandon up again with more anti-septic cream etc and bandaged him up before we realised we were all shattered enough to go to bed at 10pm…talk about party die-hards lol. When the rest of the guys were out of the room cleaning their teeth etc Brandon stopped me, gave me a hug and said that I was a ‘life saver’ and that he really appreciated everything I’d done for him. The night ended, not with a private party, we’ll call it a ‘get together’…but you’ll have to wait for those details because my battery is running out on my laptop lol
And today I’ve just been chilling out with the guys and getting some last minute things done and bought…not to mention packing which wasn’t fun because I’ve been feeling physically sick for the last two days knowing that I’m going back. If I’m honest I’m dreading it. Not because I have to go back to a job or the same old routine but because of the people. I’m not sure I’m ready to ‘forgive and forget’ their reactions so easily. I don’t mean that I’m holding a grudge, just that I think my feelings towards certain people and things have changed and I’m not sure how it’s going to work any more. Despite all the excellent and fun times I’ve had and the amazing people I’ve met, I’m still heartbroken. You may think that I would have ‘learnt to let go by now’ since it’s been 3 months since my miscarriage and Mr Officer but until you go through it yourself, you have no idea how painful it is and I’m not going to pretend that I’m ‘back to normal’ just because you think I should be ‘over it already’. I’ll be fine; I know I will…hell, at one of my lowest points of recent years, essentially, I ran away from home to travel solo around Asia…whether you are prepared to realise it or not, I am an incredibly strong young woman and I wish people would start to believe it.
Anyway. better go…have my dress to go and pick up and a 27 journey ahead of me.
Talk to you on the other side!
p.s. currently I’m sat in Hong Kong airport after a successful flight from Bali and I’m crying at the thought of going back…the reality of it all is beginning to sink in and all I can think is where I can run away to next and how quickly…who wants to come to the travel agents with me?